Teach Her to Use Grit
When we think of masculine men, we (women at least) envision those with one overriding quality: a spine of steel. Nothing makes a woman’s heart melt like a man with courage and resolve. We admire men who are willing to risk their lives to help good triumph over evil and who have the moral wit to distinguish between the two. Masculinity means strength. You see it in the way men work. Men in construction start their jobs early and end them late. Soldiers in Iraq risk their lives every day. Pilots continue to fly in spite of personal fear. Men in high finance are often highly charged, deeply driven, and propel themselves through hard work to success. Men work with such intensity because they have grit. Sometimes you can have so much grit, so much hard driving, so much silent internalizing of frustration and stress that it can kill you.
But that’s in the workplace. Now think about your home life. Here is your place of quiet and solace: a friendly family dog and a doting wife and children. Don’t you wish?
Home is work too, because just as people need you to do things at work, your wife and your daughters need you to do things at home. Not just fixing things around the house, but being the man they need you to be. That can sometimes mean intervening in their disputes and helping them solve their problems.
Pragmatism helps men find solutions to problems, and grit enables you to apply these solutions day after day, year after year. These two qualities teach your daughter to the same.