CHALLENGE: Day 1
Day 1 of the Happy Mother Challenge
Read Chapter 1: “Understand your Value as a Mother” from The 10 Habits of Happy Mothers
I want you to feel good about yourself as a mother because you should. You should feel good about the job that you are doing because, if you are like most American moms, you are far too critical of the job you’re doing. I can see that being a great mom matters to you. You want to get it right and you assess your performance daily. What you need to know is that you assess your performance far more critically than your kids do—they just want YOU. Just as you are.
ASSIGNMENT:
Make a list. Yes, a list. But be serious about it. I know you have a list in your head about everything that you don’t do right. It’s a long list of every little failure and moment that you think you really messed up this Mom “job.”
I want you to make an actual, physical list of things that you are really GOOD at and what you LIKE about yourself, just as you are. Write down what you are, what you like, what you dream about, what makes you happy, what you’re good at, etc. A Happy List. A Positive List. Now, take that list and put it in your wallet. Take it out when you’re having a tough day and read through it when those negative thoughts embed themselves in your mind. Remember that you have value and you are good. Just as you are.
After you’ve completed the exercise, come back and leave a comment. Was it hard to make the list? What did you learn about yourself?
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15 Responses to “CHALLENGE: Day 1”
What a great way to start the day! Sleeping babies, a cup of joe, and four journal pages of inspiration. So nice to be reminded that I can like things beyond Fisher Price toys that dont make any noise. ; ) and that I have influence just as I am. Thanks Meg!
I am a day behind, I can’t wait to do this tomorrow.
This was very tough. At first I would think of something and then think about how that may not be right or I’m not really good at that. After a while I did come up with some things that I do well that aren’t kid related. Thank you for reminding us of ourselves as people, not just moms.
I agree, this was tough. I had the same issues as Trudy. It took a long time to get the list started, but once I did things seemed to come a little more easily. Looking forward to next week’s challenge.
Great Challange!. I read the first chapter a month ago… but never did the list they suggest. I read the chapter again yesterday… and started my list.. a little bit wierd at the biginning, because I am not use to write or think about myself… but a little bit of thought and the right music make it happen. Thanks… awesome book. I am plannng on reading the book about raising boys as soon as I finish this challenge.
[...] first challenge that started yesterday from her blog. I still need to make my list. “I want you to make an [...]
I read the first chapter and started crying because I relate to it so much! It was very difficult for me to make my list but I did it. I learn that I take too many negative things to heart when I really should be concentrating on the positives.
I like this challenge, it wasn’t too hard for me because I have a great support group of friends, and we are constantly reminding eachother of all we do and our value – not just as a Mom and wife.
I struggle to do the things I am good at or want to, because I seem to always come last in the area of priorities.
I had more negative than positive things when I compared the two lists.
I also had tears well up as I read this first chapter. My failure to understand my value as a mother is compounded by post partum depression. Right now I don’t like who I am and think that I really suck as a wife and a mother. (I am in therapy and take meds, so no need to urge me to get treatment.)
I did manage to make a short list of 6 items. For every item I couldn’t help but think of the negative side of it. For example, one item on my list is that I love to cook. I wrote it down and then thought “No one is going to like what I prepare for dinner anyway and then I’ll be the one stuck cleaning up and doing the dishes anyway, so why bother.” The joy I get in cooking is sucked out by what comes after.
I’ll keep working on the list. As mentioned above, the things I’m good at doing or the things I want to do usually come last on the list of priorities. No one else in my house seems to have doing laundry or washing dishes on their list, so I get stuck with it. :/
Deb, I am struggling with postpartum depression, too, and totally understand the battle of thoughts that goes on in your head! Before we figured out what was wrong, I would just sit on the couch, thinking about the stuff I needed/wanted to do and then coming back with the negative responses… it was literally incapacitating! I hope every day gets a little bit better for you and that this challenge helps! I know it’s helping me!
Thanks for the great book! Our book club is reading it for February. I also printed out the challenge and distributed it to our book club members (we have a Catholic women’s book club that meets once a month). Thank you for putting up this challenege!
[...] list. In conjunction with the book, Dr. Meeker is currently running a 10-day Happy Mother Challenge on her website. She’s still Day 1 of the challenge with the following [...]
The challenge of making the list was nice. I understand that it is important to re-visit my strengths, dreams etc… but now what? I have never lost track of what I like to do, who I am, what I want… but what is keeping it in my wallet going to do? Its hard for me to accept that “postpartum depression” is all me– overwhelmed. In order for me to be a happy mom– accepting my children for who they are, accepting my life as it is, leading by example… how are we supposed to get the rest of the family on board with acknowledging that– as the mother, human, individual– we have needs to be our own person too. Like Deb or Lori or maybe someone else… we may like who we are, want to be happy, we may know what will make us happier– but the real challenge for me seems to be getting other people to take care of their own stuff, stop complaining, stop pushing responsibilities to my plate. How do I get other family members to recognize my value I see in myself? what am I missing?
I learned that I don’t celebrate well, let alone celebrate myself well. I’m always pushing, but don’t slow down to look back & see what actually went great, are great, or to see the things I should be grateful for.